Men CANNOT Be Hoes - by @MilfGod

           I've noticed a lot of confusion in regard to what makes someone a ho. However, one thing is for certain: only females can be considered one. I'm not trying bash women at all. I just want you to think about a few things using the concept dubbed "logic". 


       First, let's look at the history & etymology (SAT swag) of the words ho & hoes. Ho is originally derived from the word whore. A whore is someone that exchanges sexual favors for either money, food, hair weave or Louis purses (services not limited to those listed). Whores are nothing new. It's actually the oldest profession in the world. Some whores are self-employed, some are controlled by pimps, usually a man... sometimes a madam. (also an old profession. Hey, somebody gotta keep these hoes in line right?) So whether you're an escort, a skrippa or a "waitress" at a strip joint, you're a prostitute for profiting off of sex... thus making you a ho.


       Next thing we have to look at is what we define as a ho. Personally, I define a ho as someone that uses her body to get ahead or cannot control her sexual urges. However, a common misconception is that these are necessarily bad things. Socially they are, economically they aren't. Being a ho amongst social circles be it classmates, co-workers, clubs, or social networks (LMAO) can & will carry a negative connotation. Ho behavior is indicative of loose morals or no self-respect. Which is bullshit, because you could not be a ho, but still display these things. But I digress... 

I ain't even excited.

      On the almighty dollar side of things, hoes just feed off men's addiction of pussy. They can only ho as much as we let them, fellas. Tired of every chick being a ho? Well... stop enabling them.  How can you expect chicks not to see the glamour in being a ho when we got Basketball Baby Mommas & Ratchet Sluts Club on TV? Bitches in mansions with millionaire husbands #nshit. Being a ho is big business now. We gotta start making hoes feel slimy, vile & ashamed about this shit again. They just flaunting it out here with no consequnce, converting the few good girls we got left. Remember when Pamela Anderson was seen as a freak? A lot of the niggas reading this got daughters that'll put Pamela to shame. So stop trickin & ration the money at a reasonable rate so hoes don't take over the world. 


     So now that we have a good understanding of what a ho is & why they exist, we have to analyze why this is an estrogen-based affliction. It's very simple too: it's all perception. I never overhead a girl talk session at a slumber party so I don't know what girls talk about at their tribunals. However, I do know that if the group is small enough, they will reveal their most recent sexual exploits to either destroy/build up the rep of the male(s) involved. But if the group is too big, they most likely won't tell all that stuff to avoid everyone they know thinking they're hoes. Which is dumb anyway, because that small group is just as likely to tell your business, but we all know bitches are stupid. 


     So we can already see that females base their decisions off what other people might think (as much as they SWEAR they do not). This can only mean being a ho has nothing to do with the actions of a ho, but more so what other people may perceive as ho behavior. Hence the new millennium cliche "lady in the streets, but a slut in the bedroom". She will try her hardest to put up the front of not being a ho, but will not give a millimeter of fucks when behind closed doors or at least when she thinks nobody's watching. Nobody wants to be known as the village slut. The shame that comes with it is too much. 

Yeah, I'm a ho... BUT I'M GETTIN PUSSY BEEEEEEEYOTCH!!!!!!!

    What women fail to realize is that MEN DON'T CARE ABOUT WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK IN TERMS OF PROMISCUITY! We don't care if someone calls us a ho if it means we getting pussy. Trust me, you're not hurting us. You're just making it look like you're keeping track of our dick. Men are all about conquering. Plus, you know the more pussy we get, the more status we got among our boys. We just tryna be Julius Caesars of the bedroom... or  staircase in the projects if you're anything like me. "You fuck anything that moves" Oh... well thanks for noticing bitch! I'm sposed to feel bad now? Obviously if chicks wanna fuck me, it means I got enough experience to knock the bottom out your shit. Bodies are like experience points on Pokemon. Just call my dick Squirtle, I'm tryna evolve into a Blastoise boo. So unless your pussy got a special potion to help me do that... STFU! Be honest ladies, how many of y'all tryna fuck a dude that claims to be a virgin? Be honest with yourself. You like male hoes, we like being hoes, so the negative connotation of being a "ho" has no effect on us. We are immune. 


    I wish I could nail this shit to the doors of the White House. It's that serious. Stop asking "how come girls can be hoes, but guys can't?". Because bitch, YOU make yourself a ho! Not us. You don't wanna be seen as a ho, we do. It's that simple. Haven't you bitches seen movies like "How To Be A Player" or "The Wood"? The nigga that gets the most pussy will always be THAT NIGGA. And because y'all are the hoes that y'all are, you always wanna fuck THAT NIGGA. Therefore, we will continue trying to become THAT NIGGA. THAT NIGGA getting all the pussy.